What does not kill you..................

Makes you stronger?! So they say. That means I should be pretty strong , right?!

I don’t feel very strong, I feel despair. I am really worried about getting Lymphedema. I have always had ‘sizable breasts’, and I guess like many woman, can proudly present a wardrobe full of clothes of various sizes.  This includes my bras. What I was not prepared for, was the possibility of one breast ( the operated one) swelling up. This has resulted in me having ( I am guessing) a ‘G’ cup on one side and a ‘B’ cup on the other. A slight challenge when trying to wear a bra and believe me, I have tried every one I have.  Unless I want to work in a circus, it is definitely not the look  I would opt for voluntarily.

In my worry, I emailed the surgeon, asking her if this was normal or if I should be worried, i.e. could it be another infection, that ends up in another cancer tumor.  I should have known better, then to expect any kind of support or help. Below is a copy of the mail I sent and answer from the professional surgeon.

Her answer was two words, ‘ could be’.  What can I say?

From: Dra Victoria Scholz
Sent: martes, 09 de mayo de 2017 9:42
To: Anke Werner
Subject: Re: pregunta

Puede ser

Enviado desde mi iPhone

El 8 may 2017, a las 22:27, Anke Werner - escribió:

Hola Dr Scholz

Tengo una pregunta. ¿Es posible que mi seno izquierdo esté hinchado? Se siente más grande que la derecha.

No tengo dolor. Estoy haciendo ejercicios de brazo todos los días. Siento que mi seno izquierdo ha aumentado de tamaño la semana pasada.
Un Saludo

Anke

Not being satisfied with the answer from my surgeon ( tell me someone who would be) , I managed to eventually find someone who offered Lymphatic drainage. I had it done this morning. Interesting. I did not expect it to be so ‘gentle’. The doctor ( I am not sure if the lady is a doctor or what title she has), a lovely kind lady, explained that I could get Lymphedema anytime. She told me of women who got it 9 years after the operation.  ( Can’t wait). She did recommend that I buy a ‘plastic sleeve and glove’ and wear it as much as possible. Just marvellous. I live on the Costa del Sol, with the temperatures climbing as high as 40 º during the summer and now I am supposed to ‘rubber up’. It sounds like a ‘tight’, ‘sweaty’, ‘uncomfortable’ time ahead. I am doing my exercises, still waving!!!!! She also told me that I should not wear my watch or rings on the left hand and that I should lift NOTHING with that hand.

I also had an appointment to see ‘my’ doctor in the Spanish system for tomorrow, as I need him to sign certain papers for the government / social security office. I would add, he wants to sign these papers every two week, even though I have been ‘signed off’ until I finish my Herceptin the end of August. Yet, he insists on me coming in to see him every fortnight. Our accountancy firm has told me that he is just making life difficult and that he could simply sign the papers in one meeting. Anyway, I could not make the appointment tomorrow as I have another appointment and changed it to this morning. Confirmed via internet. When I saw him earlier, he took great pleasure in telling me that I should have come tomorrow and not today and for that reason he could not sign the paper. What can I say?

Right now, I feel like forgetting about all this and instead just want to have a gallon of Gin & Tonic!! ( I have not had one since last June!) 

Tomorrow will be better no doubt.